What’s in this issue:
How attachment to thoughts can cause suffering — and what you can do about it
Journaling prompts to reflect on the thoughts you’re attaching to
Creating transformative gatherings: how to take any gathering — be it a kid’s birthday party or a team meeting — and make it meaningful
😆 Today’s Laugh
Here’s one of many stories shared on the Facebook page / Tumblr Reasons My Son Is Crying…
Reason: “I ate the cracker she shoved into my mouth.”
💭 Today’s Thought
We’re about to get meta, in that today’s thought is about thoughts. 😂
A thought is harmless unless we believe it. It’s not our thoughts, but our attachment to our thoughts, that causes suffering. Attaching to a thought means believing that it’s true, without inquiring. A belief is a thought that we’ve been attaching to, often for years.
- Byron Katie
As a woman and a leader, I’ve told myself all sorts of harmful stories about my worth, how others perceive me, and what I deserve… and I’ve caused myself a good deal of pain (and shame) as a result. What about you?
The semi-relieving bit of news is, we all do it to some extent… it’s part of the glorious mess of being human. 😅
And I’ve come to love Byron Katie’s four-step line of questioning as a way to examine the underlying thought behind feelings of anxiety, fear, or shame — and then make a conscious choice about whether I want to believe it.
The questions are:
Is it true? (yes or no; if no, move to 3)
Can you absolutely know that it’s true? (yes or no)
How do you react or behave when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without the thought?
These questions invite us to take in new data and perspectives and to temporarily experience a version of ourselves where we’ve let go of the thought causing us pain.
If you give these a try, shoot me a note and let me know what you experience!
Remember: you always get to choose which thought you want to attach yourself to. And if it’s all made up anyway, why not attach yourself to a constructive one?
🖊️ Today’s reflection
If you’re new to journaling, I highly encourage you to read Nancy Adler’s article: Want to be an outstanding leader? Keep a journal.
This week, find a quiet place and gift yourself 10 minutes to reflect on any of these prompts (or invent your own!):
What thought(s) do you tend to attach yourself to?
Pick a thought that feels really powerful — what circumstances tend to trigger it?
What do you gain from attaching to that thought? (I mean it — there usually is something we gain from this!) And what’s the cost?
What would life would be like without that thought?
📚 Today’s Read
3 steps to turn everyday get-togethers into transformative gatherings
Watch this ~10 minute TED Talk by Priya Parker — author of the book The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters — for new insights on how to make any kind of gathering (be it a kid’s birthday party or a team meeting) meaningful and full of connection.
See you next week!
xo,
Anne
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